I am the oldest of three with 10 years between my sister and I, and 3 years between my brother and I. Since, I don’t have an older sibling, I’ve always tried to be the big sister who keeps my younger siblings from harm’s way and teach them the hard lessons that I had to learn. Although, my intentions are always good, my executions are sometimes…abrasive. The love I have for them is often lost in my misguided attempts to “advise” them.
“Meet people where they are and do not attempt to remake them or “help them” but love them and allow Me to work through that love.” -God
I prayed about my conduct and that is what God revealed to me. Essentially, it is not my job to do the refining, but His. We all have someone (or someones) that we care for deeply and want God’s absolute best for them, but we cannot do for others the very things that we cannot do for ourselves. I didn’t remake myself, God did, so I can’t remake my siblings. You didn’t save yourself, Jesus did, so you can’t save your loved one(s).
Now, there is a thin line between a) loving and praying for them and b) loving and enabling them! For example, my siblings are candy addicts, so buying them a jumbo bag of lollipops would be enabling them. However, if they received candy at school, it would be better to pray that God (not me) would remind them that their bodies are the temple.
The beauty about trusting God with our loved ones is that He loves them exponentially more than we do and has an intimate knowledge of them that we don’t. We can be confident that they are in marvelous hands…the Hands of their Creator.